All of You Read online

  If that was even possible.

  Kat didn’t know the tears were falling until she felt Stella’s hands on her face, wiping them away.

  “Nathan, do something,” Stella hissed, turning Kat around so she couldn’t see Danny and wiping at her damp face with a stack of napkins.

  Nathan huffed. “You did this. I told you not to interfere, didn’t I, Stella? But, no, you had to-”

  When Stella shot him a look that would have felled a lesser man, Nathan crossed his arms over his chest with a sigh and glanced back at Danny.

  “Just take me home. Please,” Kat said, shoving Stella’s hands away. “I need to leave. Now.” She stood, forcing Stella and Gigi to back up.

  “I’ll take her.” Nathan offered Kat his arm, which she gratefully accepted. When Gigi objected, Nathan shook his head. “It’s best I get out the hell out of here. Otherwise I’m liable to do something I’ll regret, too.”

  Stella grabbed her purse, but Nathan shook his head at her, too.

  Stella’s brows dropped. “Wait, what-”

  “Make sure someone drives Danny home right after we leave. He’s shitfaced and there are about a hundred different ways he could get his ass in trouble tonight,” Nathan said.

  “But-” Stella sputtered.

  Nathan shook his head once more before walking Kat out, putting his big body between her and the hideousness on the dance floor. They walked out to Nathan’s SUV, waited for it to warm up, and then drove home in silence.

  It was a good kind of silence, a silence only two introverts could appreciate and understand. Nathan knew Kat was upset, which meant she needed to internally deal with things, without a barrage of questions, psychoanalyzations, or heated discussions. His presence was very comforting and Kat would be eternally grateful for his strong, silent support as she quietly wept the entire trip.

  Although, at a particularly fevered crescendo of Kat’s sobbing, Nathan had been compelled to awkwardly pat her on the shoulder a few times. It was a sweet gesture she really appreciated, especially since she knew Nathan was the least expressive human being ever to walk the planet.

  As they neared her apartment, Nathan cleared his throat. “Stella will rip my face off if I don’t ask you to spend the night at our place tonight.”

  “Thanks, but no. I need to be alone right now,” she replied hoarsely.

  “Yeah, I figured.” Nathan gave her a tiny smile. “But you know your sister. Better to do what she says than hear about it later.”

  They exchanged a knowing glance and Kat managed to crack a tiny smile.

  “You also know you can call anytime and I’ll come get you. Day or night, no matter what time it is. Don’t hesitate. Just call or text Stella or me. If you need anything.” Nathan glanced out the driver’s side window. “We’re always here for you, Kat.”

  Somehow Kat’s body managed to produce a few more tears. “Yes, I know. Thank you.”

  Nathan turned into the parking lot, pulled into a spot, and put the Denali in park.

  As Kat undid her seatbelt and grabbed her purse, Nathan cleared his throat. “Listen, this is none of my business and I know Danny acted like a huge asshole tonight, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about you, because he does. Hell, that’s why he acted like that, as fucked-up as that sounds.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Kat fidgeted with the zipper on her purse.

  “He’s coped like that ever since I’ve known him. He feels hurt – or fear – and he lashes out like a wounded animal.”

  “How does he usually get over it?” Kat asked. At Nathan’s quirked brow, she said, “The hurt. The fear.”

  “I don’t think he ever really gets over it. He mouths off and brawls and laughs and swaggers, but that doesn’t fix shit. And, I don’t know how much you know about his past, but he’s got a lot of shit to fix. His parents didn’t want him, so they gave him away, but not before neglecting the hell out of him. Every foster home he was in sent him back. The last home kept him till he was eighteen, but that was more of a kindness-of-their-hearts/pity thing.” Nathan scoffed softly. “My mom had a lot of issues, but at least she loved us in her very limited, very fucked up way. Same with my brothers. Lots of shit I won’t get into, but at least we had each other growing up. Danny had no one.”

  The broken pieces of Kat’s heart ached and throbbed.

  “Well, it doesn’t really matter, because nothing can come of any of this. I know the others wouldn’t understand, but you do, Nathan.” Kat stared unseeingly out of the passenger side window. “There’s a lot of baggage that comes along with having me in your life. My family is stuck with me and there’s nothing I can do about that, but I would never involve someone else in this mess. You felt the same way when things got serious with you and Stella.” Kat turned back to face him. “I know you can understand wanting to spare people the trauma.”

  Nathan nodded. “I know exactly what you mean. But, let’s look at it from this angle…do you think Stella is unhappy she took me on? That she loved me – loves me – despite all of my issues and what a pain-in-the-ass I can be? Do you think she’d undo it if she could?”

  “No, of course not, but your baggage isn’t life or death. Your baggage doesn’t leave people behind, heartbroken and alone. It doesn’t rob the people you love of happiness and force them to watch you wither away and die.” Kat’s eyes welled. “I could never do that to him. Or anyone else. It isn’t fair.”

  “Fair’s got nothing to do with it, Kat. Neither does logic, not when it comes to shit like this.” He lifted a shoulder. “And maybe you should let Danny decide for himself what he’s willing to take on. I think he might surprise you.”

  Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of.

  When Kat didn’t respond, Nathan cleared his throat. “Anyway, like I said, none of my business, but I thought I should say it.” He gave her a tiny smile. “I think your sister might be rubbing off on me. That was more touchy-feely crap than I usually say in a decade.”

  Kat laughed. “Well, thanks. I appreciate you telling me all of that. And giving me a ride. But most especially for forcing Stella to stay back at the club because I could not handle her right now.”

  They both grinned before Nathan got out and came around to the passenger side to help her down and walk her to the door.

  Kat unlocked the door and opened it. “Give Stella and Gia a hug for me. Tell Stell I’ll text her later, although I’m sure I already have twenty texts on my phone.”

  Nathan grinned. “Okay, will do. Goodnight.”

  He abruptly walked away and Kat closed the door behind him. She locked it, turned around, and leaned her back against it with a sigh.

  All she could think about were Danny’s hands on that woman’s body. And that bitch’s hands on his body. Her perfectly French-tipped nails running through his hair…

  She slowly sank down to the floor and pulled her knees up to her chest.

  Images of Danny and that woman together doing God-knew-what swirled through her brain and Kat’s hand flew to her mouth and her stomach clenched as fresh, new waves of pain, jealousy, and rage washed over her.

  And – right or wrong – all Kat could think was mine…

  Mine.

  MINE.

  Chapter Twenty

  ‡

  Danny knew things were grim when he couldn’t even bring himself to drink anymore. His last one had been about two hours ago, right after he’d danced with…

  Rachel?

  No…

  Raquel?

  No, Rebecca.

  Well, whatever the fuck her name was.

  In Danny’s defense, he hadn’t had all that much time to meet and greet. As soon as Kat and Nathan had walked by, Danny had left what’s-her-name standing on the dance floor mid-song and followed them.

  Nathan had caught sight of Danny and delivered him a scathing don’t-even-think-about-it glance Danny hadn’t thought twice about heeding – drunk, heartsick, and furious, or not. Because tangling with a pissed off
Nathan wouldn’t have ended well for anyone.

  So, Danny had called a cab and spent the entire ride wondering how – despite the absolute mess Kat had made of his life for the past week – the handful of hours they’d spent together seemed more right and natural than the previous 11,680 days he’d lived without her.

  Which was probably why Danny had resorted to second grade pigtail-pulling to ruffle Kat’s feathers.

  And apparently he had ruffled her feathers. The text message Nathan had sent an hour ago left very little room for doubt:

  Too pissed to talk to you tonight. Just wanted you to know you made Kat cry. A lot. Good job, fuck-face.

  Yeah, that text had sobered him right up.

  Danny knew her friends and family were probably just as pissed as Nathan, but all they’d seen was Danny trying to get over her after she’d already rejected him.

  Why the hell had she been upset, anyway? Kat didn’t want him. She’d walked away from him after he’d all but begged – no, actually, he had begged – her to stay. Clearly she wasn’t into him or was too chicken shit to admit it, if she was. Or maybe she was already falling for that Ben guy.

  Danny crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back into the couch. His eyes fixed on the ceiling, he thought about how royally screwed he was. He couldn’t have the woman he was in love with, but – thanks to these stupid ass feelings – he couldn’t be with anyone else. Which left him as the lonely, celibate monk he’d always dreaded he’d become if he’d actually picked up some morals.

  Someone starting banging like crazy on his door.

  “What the hell…” Danny glanced down at the cable box clock.

  1:13 a.m.

  Maybe Nathan had decided he wanted a face-to-face, after all.

  Danny more than welcomed the distraction. Maybe Nathan would swing on him and they could go a few rounds, because Danny could definitely use a physical outlet for all of the emotional shit he was feeling right now.

  Not to mention the damn near debilitating sexual frustration.

  Danny got up off the couch to answer the door, but before he’d taken two steps, the door flew open and Kat stalked in.

  Looking wild.

  Her hazel eyes were flashing, her hands were balled into fists at her sides, and her hair was pulled up into a wild, messy bun. She still had her club outfit on, no jacket, and tear tracks down each cheek.

  “Kat? What in the hell…”

  “Is that slut here?” Kat shoved him aside and glanced around.

  She began manically searching the main floor, flipping on and turning off lights as she moved room to room, while Danny could do nothing but stand there dumbstruck, watching.

  Kat slammed the basement door and marched over to him hands on hips. “Well, is she?”

  “Uh…”

  Kat waved off his dithering and continued her search. “You better get her the hell out of her before I find her, Danny, or I swear to God I will lose my shit!” She stomped up the stairs – bad leg, be damned – and Danny could hear rustling, doors opening and slamming, and Kat doing a whole lot of cursing under her breath.

  A few seconds later, she stomped back down the stairs.

  Her face was flushed and her eyes were damp and narrowed. Kat’s hands found her hips again. “What, you already done?” She sneered. “Well, aren’t you Mr. Quick and Efficient.”

  “Kat-”

  “Where is she?”

  Some of the shock had worn off, leaving Danny highly amused, aroused as hell, and giddy as a fucking pig in shit.

  He arranged his face into indifference, crossed his arms over his chest, and lifted a shoulder. “She, who?’”

  Kat jabbed a finger into his chest. “I am not playing around right now, Danny. The blonde whore from the club…is she or is she not still here? And do not lie to me!”

  “What do you care?” he shot back. “You don’t want me. Why do you care if someone else does?”

  “Because…I…we…you…” Kat stomped her foot. “I never said I didn’t want you!”

  “You ignored me, wouldn’t even answer a damn phone call or text. You told me it would never work out and asked me to leave your apartment. You…” Danny’s throat tightened, all humor suddenly gone. “You turned your back and walked away after I asked you to stay.” He scoffed softly. “How is that you wanting me?”

  Kat threw her hands in the air. “So that’s your response? I push you away once and you move on? You find some other woman to screw and totally forget what happened between us?”

  “Oh, you mean kind of like what you did going on a date two days after I had my mouth between your legs? After we spent all that time talking and laughing and…” Danny grabbed the back of his head. “I don’t know…getting to know each other, I guess. Then I have to hear from Nathan that some other man is taking you out – feeding you, touching you, leering at you. Making you laugh and watching you smile.”

  He turned his head, trying desperately to pull himself together before this officially became the most pathetically cheesy speech in the history of the world.

  When Danny turned back, he made sure he had his best game face on.

  Hands on hips, he said, “This is all on you, Kat. I want you. I’ve wanted you from the second I met you. I told you that. And I meant every goddamned word.” He shrugged. “But this is your call, sweetheart. Your move. Because I cannot figure out what the fuck you’re thinking or what the fuck you want.”

  “I want you!”

  Danny’s first instinct, after pinching them both to verify this was, indeed, reality, was to take over. To close the distance between them, grab her, and get them as closely as humanly possible, for as long as the two of them could stand it.

  He was dying to touch and taste every inch of her…wanted to know every secret she kept and where she kept it. Danny wanted to prove he was worthy of keeping those secrets and that her body and heart would always be safe with him.

  But this had to be Kat’s show.

  Danny knew what he wanted, and not just for tonight, but Kat wasn’t there yet.

  And maybe she never would be.

  Danny knew there was a high probability he’d walk away from this completely destroyed, but even the slight possibility of having her was worth the risk.

  Whatever was left of his heart already belonged to her anyway, so, really, what the hell was the difference?

  He stared into her deep, mysterious hazel eyes; he took in her long, dark lashes, flushed cheeks, and her cute little overbite before finally focusing on the amazing lips he’d been dreaming of and jerking off to the past eighteen months.

  Danny’s entire body trembled with the need to have her…

  All of her.

  And not just her body; he was starved for her mind. Danny wanted to discover every secret corner of it, every fear hidden away, every hope, dream, and wish she’d ever had. He wanted to take on every hurt and doubt and know every happiness she’d ever felt.

  He wanted her complete trust and her love, and to be loved by her in return.

  Danny was a greedy motherfucker because he wanted it all.

  But he needed her to give it freely. Especially this time…because this time meant everything, in every sense of the word.

  “You want me?” Danny asked throatily, eyeing her in that way of his – the way that made her feel completely exposed and terribly wanted.

  Kat’s hard breaths became full-on pants.

  When she nodded, Danny’s lips curled. His hands came off his hips, arms slowly opening at his sides. “Then come and get me.”

  Kat felt foolish.

  Again.

  She had no idea what to do, how to behave. How to take what she wanted. And she had zero clue how to give him what he wanted.

  Danny was so damned experienced. Surely whatever Kat did would seem silly and incredibly unimpressive to him.

  She was overwhelmed with feelings of inadequacy, uncertainty, and embarrassment. Yet again.

  But th
is time, she didn’t run, because she wanted him – needed him – more than she wanted to hide from him.

  “I don’t know how, Danny,” Kat replied softly. “I want you so badly – I want this – but I don’t know what to do. I need you to show me.” She searched his eyes, voice lowering to a hoarse whisper. “Can you show me, Danny?”

  His smile faded and Kat’s heart sank, knowing she’d probably turned him off completely.

  Danny was used to women who knew what they wanted, how they wanted it, and exactly how to take it…women who knew exactly what Danny wanted and how to please him.

  Unfortunately for them both, Kat knew very little about any of that.

  Utter mortification flooded her body.

  “I’ll…yeah…” She pointed over her shoulder. “I should leave,” Kat said, barely able to push the words past her constricted throat and tightened chest. “I’m sorry…” She turned away.

  “Where do you think you’re going?” Kat turned back to find Danny’s sexy half-smile back in place. He crooked a finger at her. “Come here, Kat.”

  Despite her knees having turned to jelly, Kat managed to walk over to him, positioning herself about two feet from his body.

  She looked up into his eyes, a massive shiver wracking her entire body at the lust and affection she saw there.

  “That’s still too far away, Kat,” he said, voice deep and husky. Another shiver shot down her spine when his gaze dropped and latched onto her lips. “Come closer.”

  Kat slowly closed the gap until they were only about a foot apart. She instinctively inhaled deeply, catching a hint of cologne mixed with his distinctive scent…

  Damn pheromones.

  Kat inhaled deeply again, surprised and amazed at the physiological responses just the scent of him elicited. Her nipples hardened and tingled and blood rushed to the lower half of her body as a flush spread across the top half. Her palms dampened, her mind simultaneously blanked and raced, and her lips parted…

  She shifted her weight, nearly moaning at the friction and dampness of her panties against her swollen labia.

  “Kat?” When she opened her eyes (not having realized she’d shut them), Kat found Danny smiling down at her. “You okay?”